Pinky and the Brain: February 1997

Cover

Drawn by: Walter Carzon and Mike DeCarlo

A parody of the Mission: Impossible movie poster. At the bottom is the title, Mission: Impinkable. The usual logo is replaced by red lettering in the same style as the title. The Brain's head, in semi-silhouette, is shown in the center, with an outline map of the globe over it. Along the bottom is a stereotypical Russian skyline.


Mission: Impinkable

Credits

Synopsis

Pinky's latest shipment from the 8-Track of the Month Club was damaged during shipment. Instead of Run-DMC Sings Zamfir's Greatest Hits, it contains a secret microcassette and microfilm. The Brain decides to play the tape, and is rewarded with instructions and plans to steal the new Microstomp 1286 Gak chip, supposedly the Internet control program for the 21st century.

They travel to the Microstomp lab, dressed for a mission and armed with detailed knowledge of Microstomp's security defenses. They avoid deadly laser beams with the help of hand mirrors; they use a grappling gun to almost avoid an electrified floor; finally, the Brain analyzes Byll Grates, the head of Microstomp, and deduces his innermost desire - and thus the password to the innermost lab.

Once inside, they discover they're too late to take the prototype chip: it's being moved to the site of the media event where it will be unveiled. Pinky suggests they simply make another, and the Brain realizes they can do exactly that. While he sets to work, Pinky goes off to play with what he thinks is a copy machine. The Brain succeeds in producing a chip, and they proceed with their plans.

They go into the media event disguised as a reporter and cameraman. After bluffing their way past a security guard, they use a super-bright camera light as cover to swap their chip for the real one. With that accomplished, they watch as Grates plugs their chip in - but, instead of the Brain's personality taking over the Internet, it's Pinky's. The copy machine turned out to be the scanner used to load the Gak chip. Thwarted once again, they return to the lab, as Pinky's smiling face stares out of Grates' computer.

Did You Notice...

Technical nits


I, Brainius

Credits

Synopsis

50 AD in the Roman Empire. Pinkus and Brainius are slaves in a rock quarry, a situation Brainius would like to change. His plan: to gain Caesar's eye by winning the annual chariot race, then impressing him with his latest invention, spaghetti sauce in a bottle. As he explains the plan to Pinkus, another slave tries to start a revolt, only to be captured and hauled off to serve as a galley slave. Brainius realizes that's his ticket out of the quarry, and so he sets out to start his own revolt.

Brainius tries to rouse the other slaves with a stirring speech, but all he achieves is putting them to sleep over their lunch. A more indirect approach is next, as Brainius tries to stop production by putting itching powder in the other slaves' shorts, but all that accomplishes is to increase their productivity. Finally, trickery does the job: he gets the slaves to charge the governor's tent by promising them new sandals if they bring a sharp, pointy stick with them. The governor decides enough is enough and sends Brainius and Pinkus to a ship to serve as galley slaves.

After many leagues of rowing - for the ship, not the mice, who have a different job - they reach Rome. They distract the guards with bottles of spaghetti sauce and escape. After acquiring a chariot and a horse, they enter the great race. Just when all seems hopeless - for they are thoroughly outclassed by the other entries - their horse turns and runs the wrong way, causing the other entrants to crash into each other. They win the race by default. Caesar crowns them victors, and Pinkus shows him the spaghetti sauce in a bottle. Caesar elevates Brainius to the position of his personal tribune. That job only lasts a few moments, for the sauce acts just like any other, and comes gushing out of the bottle and gets all over Caesar and his men. Caesar is so enraged that he sends the mice right back to the slave pit where they started.

Did You Notice...

Technical nits


Jay Maynard, jmaynard@phoenix.net

Last updated 27 March 1997